Beyond Calories: Creating Transformative Awareness around Weight Loss

Photo by Ketut Subiyanto

Weight loss is a simple formula: consume fewer calories than you burn, and you'll lose weight. This principle is undeniable as it is rooted in the laws of thermodynamics. Yet, for most people, the journey to achieving and sustaining weight loss is anything but simple. While science underscores the importance of energy balance, it also reveals the sobering reality of outcomes: 95% of individuals who embark on a weight loss journey fail [1] and less than 20% of those that succeed maintain their goal for more than a year [2]. These statistics aren't just a testament to the difficultly of the task — they highlight a critical gap between theoretical knowledge and practical application. The disconnect lies not in our understanding of metabolic processes but in the psychological and behavioral challenges that come with implementing this knowledge.

Why does something so simple prove to be so elusive in practice? The answer lies in how deeply our thoughts, habits, and perceptions shape our relationship with food, motivation, and the very concept of dieting.

For many, the very word "diet" triggers a cascade of negative associations — restriction, deprivation, and even punishment. Simply saying "I'm on a diet" can set up individuals for psychological conflict before they even begin. Consider research by Harris Lieberman and colleagues [3] where participants unknowingly consumed all their calories for the day via a slurried concoction totaling either 313 calories (practical starvation) or 2,294 calories (maintenance). Incredibly, participants reported no significant differences in mood, sleep quality, or mental performance between groups, underscoring the role perception has on shaping experience. The only clear variation was hunger, which makes sense due to it being a natural physiological response to a reduced caloric intake. This suggests that much of the hardship we associate with dieting stems not from physical deprivation, but from the knowledge we are on a diet. Just imagine how people would perceive their dieting experience if they were unaware of their caloric intake!

Reminiscent of the age-old maxim — "perception is reality" — how we interpret our experiences fundamentally shapes our emotional and physiological responses. An example of the power of perception can be seen in a study by Crum et al. [4], where participants were told they were either consuming a high-calorie "indulgent" milkshake or a low-calorie "sensible" one, though both shakes were identical. Those individuals who believed they consumed the indulgent shake reported greater satiety and experienced a larger decrease in the hunger hormone ghrelin. This further highlights a critical truth: how we perceive our actions, especially when it comes to weight loss, matters. When dieting is seen as a sacrifice, it can become an uphill battle. Therefore, framing dieting with purpose such as an act of proper nourishment or empowerment towards a new you instead of a form of deprivation can make the process a more rewarding and sustainable endeavor. 

Adding to the psychological battle even further is the idea of "projection bias," a cognitive distortion where individuals overestimate their ability to handle future challenges. We inherently believe we will make the right choice when the time comes, however we often miscalculate our future discipline when the challenge presents itself, leading our resolve to crumble under the pressure of the moment. This creates a reinforcing cycle of frustration, highlighting the need for strategies that align our planning with realistic expectations of our future selves. In the moment, it's easy to plan on resisting tomorrow's temptations — the cookies in the office breakroom or choosing the sensible option over the indulgent one at dinner with friends — but when hunger and social pressures strike, resolve often crumbles like that cookie you are trying to avoid. The disconnect between the "now you" as you plan and "future you" as you are faced with executing of the plan explains why so many diets fail. Planning with overly optimistic assumptions about future discipline often leads to disappointment and derailment.

In the moment, even with a plan, traditional approaches to dieting frequently rely on willpower, yet this strategy is inherently flawed because it fails to account for the cognitive distortion of projection bias and the finite nature of self-control. By overestimating future discipline, we set ourselves up for repeated mental strain because we're forced to depend on a fatiguable muscle called willpower. Instead it would better serve us to emphasize approaches that minimize reliance on sheer determination. Because willpower is a finite resource, this constant mental tug-of-war between the logical — what we "should" do — and the impulsive desire of — what we "want" to do — is certain to deplete our mental energy over time. Therefore, success lies in designing systems and environments that reduce a reliance on willpower. For instance, removing high-calorie snacks from the home or preparing meals in advance minimizes moments of weakness and reduces decision fatigue, making healthy choices easier by default.

There are practical strategies to help reduce our need for willpower and bridge the gap between intention and action. For example, a study on the snacking behavior of secretaries revealed that proximity to, and, visibility of, foods significantly influenced their consumption [5]. Candy placed within arm's reach was consumed 1.8 times more frequently than candy placed a few feet away, and candy in an open bowl was eaten 2.2 times more often than candy in a closed container. The implication here is clear: reducing access or creating challenges to acquiring unhealthy options is more effective than relaying on sheer willpower or self-control. This can be applied to just about anything that doesn't serve our weight loss goal such as keeping high-calorie foods out of sight — or better yet, out of the house! We're much less likely to drive to the store if we desire something sweet than walking to the kitchen.

Another proven tactic to reduce mental strain is using implementation intentions or simple "if-then" rules to automate decision-making. For example, coming up with the rule of: "If I feel the urge to snack on a cookie at work, I'll drink a glass of water instead." This pre-planned response minimizes the mental effort required to make the most advantageous choice towards achieving your weight loss goal. And because satiety signals respond to volume, a full glass of water may satiate you more than a cookie, allowing you to feel that you're in charge of your weight loss journey. 

Given the limitations of willpower, adopting strategies like pre-planned responses becomes essential in bridging the gap between intention and action. These pre-planned responses not only simplify decision-making but also align with a broader strategy of cultivating mindful habits around food, sharpening awareness of how we engage with our meals and environment.

One additional factor to help with closing the gap between intention and action is to understand our interaction with food itself. Our brains don't have an innate calorie counter; instead, they rely on contextual cues to estimate intake. Distractions, such as watching TV or scrolling on a phone during meals, dull satiety signals and increase the likelihood of overeating. By practicing mindful eating — focusing on each bite and savoring the experience — you can enhance satisfaction and reduce the risk of overconsumption [6].

Beyond these immediate tactics lies a powerful opportunity for deeper change. Reframing the journey as a path of identity transformation creates a bridge between strategies discussed and the mindset needed for long-term success. Rather than viewing weight loss as a temporary endeavor filled with restrictions, aligning it with a broader sense of who you want to become can fundamentally shift your approach. Instead of saying, “I’m on a diet,” consider saying something like, “I’m becoming a healthier person.” This subtle shift in mindset aligns actions with a larger purpose, redirecting the focus from temporary restriction to lasting growth. Carol Dweck, in her book entitled *Mindset *[7], speaks to this approach, emphasizing that "becoming is better than being." In other words, focusing on progress and self-improvement provides purpose to the journey leading to better outcomes than fixating on a specific goal. By prioritizing the establishment of sustainable healthy habits — like hitting a protein goal by eating more whole foods, moving your body regularly outside in the sun, and improving your sleep hygiene — you set the foundation for long-term success.

Purpose is uniquely important, serving as the strongest motivator for behavior change, tying together the psychological challenges and solutions. Victor Frankl, a Holocaust survivor and psychiatrist, observed that “those who have a ‘why’ to live can bear almost any ‘how.’” By connecting weight loss to a meaningful purpose — such as improving health, setting an example for loved ones, or building self-confidence — individuals can reframe their individual journey as one of empowerment rather than a burdensome sacrifice. Shifting the focus from what we are giving up to what we are gaining — such as vitality, strength, quality of life, longevity — makes the trials and tribulations of the process feel more worthwhile and rewarding. Purpose not only provides clarity but serves as a unifying thread that connects practical strategies to the psychological hurdles previously discussed. By rooting the process of weight loss in a meaningful "why," the journey shifts from one of mere behavior modification to a transformative pursuit.

While weight loss may be simple in theory, the practice definitely has its challenges. However, as we have seen, these challenges are not insurmountable. This discussion isn’t meant to be a definitive guide to effortlessly achieve your ideal body because, in truth, that journey is never easy. Instead, the aim here is to create awareness around ideas and systems that work. The first step being awareness — by understanding the hurdles, we can begin to navigate them. Recognizing these obstacles makes them less daunting and allows us to develop personalized strategies that can lead to success. Reframing weight loss as a transformative journey, designing systems to reduce reliance on willpower, creating an environment that supports your goals, and connecting actions to a meaningful purpose transforms the process from one of deprivation to one of empowerment. Success in weight loss, as in any endeavor, requires acknowledging that the sum of your actions has led you to your current position, and the only way forward is an intentional effort and willingness to rewrite your story.

1. Renew Bariatrics, Diet Failure Statistics, https://renewbariatrics.com/diet-failure-statistics/

2. Wing & Phelan, 2005, https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/15798171/

3. Lieberman et al., 2008, https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/18779282/

4. Crum et al., 2011, https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21574706/

5. Wansink et al., 2006, https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/16418755/

6. Robinson et al., 2013, https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/15010185/

7. Dweck, 2006, https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30008392/

The Power of Questions: Transforming Intentions into Actions for Healthier Habits

We all make commitments we fail to honor. How many times have you said, ‘I’ll stick to my diet plan this month’ or ‘I’ll cut down on sugar starting today’, only to find yourself straying from these goals? While we often intend to follow through, good intentions alone aren’t sufficient to create meaningful change. However, a well-designed question might just be the key.

After analyzing over 100 studies covering 40 years of research, a team of scientists from four US universities found that asking questions is more effective than making statements when it comes to influencing your own or someone else’s behavior.

David Sprott, a co-author of the research from Washington State University, noted: ‘If you question a person about performing a future behavior, the likelihood of that behavior happening will change.’ Questions trigger a psychological response that differs from the response to statements.

This means, for example, that a sign that says, ‘Please choose healthy food options’ is less likely to influence its viewers’ dietary choices than a sign that asks, ‘Will you choose healthy food options today?’ Telling yourself ‘I will drink more water’ is less effective in changing your behavior than asking yourself, ‘Will I drink more water today?’

Remarkably, the researchers discovered that transforming a statement into a question could influence a person’s behavior for up to six months.

The question/behavior effect is particularly potent with questions that can be answered with a simple yes or no.

The question/behavior effect is most powerful when questions are used to encourage behavior that aligns with the receiver’s personal health goals (answering yes to the question would bring them closer to their desired fitness and nutrition objectives).

Starting the question with ‘will’ implies ownership and action, making the question/behavior effect even stronger than beginning your question with words like ‘can’ or ‘could’, which suggest capability rather than action. It’s also more effective than starting your question with ‘would’, which is conditional and implies possibility rather than probability.

Developing a System is better than Striving for a Goal

The prevailing wisdom says that the best way to properly transform your body, and health — whether it be through weight loss, muscle gain or improving overall quality of life — is to set specific, actionable goals. This notion of goal setting, while good intentioned, falls short with the majority of people. For example, according to the U.S. News & World Report, the failure rate for New Year’s Resolutions is said to be around 80%, with most people losing their resolve by mid-February. From this we can surmise that goal setting on its own is an ineffective strategy for achieving what we want and even worse for producing long lasting results. 

Goals have the ability to steer us toward short-term results. Yet, because they are inherently self-fulfilling, once they are reached, much of their power quickly dwindles. Most of what was necessarily done to create change — nutritional awareness, monitoring calories, increasing exercise, etc. — to achieve the goal is disregarded or lost. Solidifying any newfound change driven by passion is bound to fail if you’re not thoroughly invested in the process.

The fundamental problem arises as goal-oriented people are seeking to become someone they aren’t. Acting in a way that suppresses the current version of yourself — e.g. eliminating cookies and cakes therefore putting you in a calorie deficit — will allow you to arrive at a weight loss goal, but without a system put into place, willpower can only last so long. By employing measures that restrict them from who they are, without improving upon who they wish to be, in effort to deliver them to a result derived from sacrifice, the inevitable result is that they fall back to the person they were at the start of the process. Success hangs on their ability to overcome the challenges that brought them to their current impasse. As Scott Adams put it in How to Fail Big; “goal-oriented people exist in a state of continuous presuccess failure at best, and permanent failure at worst if things don’t work out.”

In effect, if your goal is to lose 30lbs, you would spend every waking moment until you reach your goal focused on numbers instead of processes, thinking as though you were a failure if things didn’t progress as planned because you are an overweight person who wants to be thin. Until you usher in a system that allows you to think and make choices like the thin version of yourself would make you will inevitably be fighting against progress and exist within a constant state of failure. Because willpower is an easily fatiguable muscle, without a systems-oriented mindset, it can only last so long before delaying gratification takes its toll, and you succumb to failure. 

Goals are a complete-it-and-be-done situation. A specific objective you either achieve or don’t sometime in the future. Being goal-oriented is short-sided if long-term change is the intention. Its approach is driven by sacrifice, deprivation, and blindness to the overt desires of the self you wish to reinvent. Alternatively, a system is something you do everyday to increase your odds of fulfillment throughout the life of the system. A system is something you do on a regular basis with a reasonable expectation that following it will provide you with the body and/or quality of life you desire, ultimately becoming the “after” version of yourself with the implementation of the process.

Simply put, if you’re waiting to achieve it someday in the future it’s a goal. If you’re doing it everyday, it’s a system. 

Losing weight is a goal; eating right is a system. Gaining muscle is a goal; training with purpose and intensity is a system. Improving any specific blood marker is a goal; “eating whole unprocessed foods, getting outside in the sun, moving a lot, sleeping like you’re on vacation, and surrounding yourself with loving relationships” is a health promoting system espoused by researcher and author Robb Wolf. All systems lead to desirable results, but all goals do not provide desirable systems, hence their unsustainability. Goals are about the results you want to achieve, whereas systems are about the processes that lead to those results. 

To achieve a goal, you only need to exhibit a momentary change, but what happens in the long run? Failure. Remission. Relapse. As an illustration, take this example from author James Clear, in his book Atomic Habits: “Imagine you have a messy room and you set a goal to clean it. If you summon the energy to tidy up, then you will have a clean room — for now. But if you maintain the same sloppy pack-rat habits that led to a messy room in the first place, soon you’ll be looking at a new pile of clutter and hoping for another burst of motivation.” Fundamentally, you’re left with the same outcome over and over again because you failed to change the system behind it. 

Results that last have little to do with goals and everything to do with systems. In the above example, you can see that the symptom was treated without addressing the cause. Much like an overweight person with a weight loss goal who has emotional issues with food — dieting will help them achieve a healthy weight, yet doesn’t address the real issue. Their achievement only changes their life momentarily because they were focused on a goal instead of fixing their system. We don’t need better results, we need better systems. Solving problems at the results level is temporary, instead, in order to create permanent change in peoples lives, we need to start solving the problem at a systems level because with the wrong approach to change people aren’t going to rise to their level of goals, they fall to their level of systems. 

None of this is to say that having goals doesn’t matter. It is important to recognize that the power of goals is derived from their ability to provide direction in our journey to become who we want, and live the life we want. This begs the question if you completely ignored your goals and solely focused on the systems your future-self used, could you still succeed in becoming the person you want to be? For example, if you were a coach and completely ignored the goal of winning, and instead focused on improving execution of what your team does in practice each day, would you still get results? Absolutely, because practicing a system to the point of excellence is akin to mastery. The goal of any sport is to finish first or with the highest score. Establishing a system provides a way to out maneuver, out strategize, out power, and out play your opponents. No one enters the arena wanting to lose, but because we are what we consistently do, plenty of teams approach competition with a flawed or suboptimal system. Singularly having a goal of winning, without a system to get there isn’t enough. Those are the coaches who get fired mid-season for staring at the scoreboard wondering why their teams score isn’t higher.

Nick Saban, the head coach of the University of Alabama football team, has what he calls The Process. He encourages players by saying; “Don’t think about winning a Championship. Think about what you need to do in this drill, on this play, in this moment.” The Process is about focusing on the task at hand. The ability to apply your system to what is directly in front of you. By existing in the present, not the distant future we can commit ourselves to excelling in the habits that will take us toward the person we wish to become. 

So, are goals useless? No, but they should be identified as having limited utility. Goals are good for setting direction, but systems are best for making long-term progress, and sustaining the health or life goal you have captured. Without a system — founded on the principles of becoming healthy, lean, and strong — goals can restrict our overall happiness. The implicit assumption behind any goal is this; “once I reach my goal, then I will be happy.” The problem with this goals-first mentality is that you’re continually putting happiness off until the next milestone. 

There once was a great archery master named Awa Kenzo who did not focus on hitting the center of the target with his students, instead he focused on teaching technical mastery of the bow. He spent almost no time instructing his students how to think in a way that would deliver the results they desired — hitting the center of the target. You can fire randomly at a target and hit a bullseye eventually, much like you can follow any dietary program and achieve results, but in a world based on vanity no one wants to hit their target and walk away, they want to keep their target, and the happiness that comes along with it. Fulfilling results come from enacting a system that allows for the target to be continuously hit, with minimal effort, consistently, until a new target is decided upon. While the goal of archery is to hit a bullseye, Kenzo pressed the fact that “the hits on the target are only the outward proof and confirmation of the adherence and trust in the process.” He wanted his students to get so lost in the process that the result wouldn’t be the focus. He wanted them to give up their notions of what archery was supposed to look like. He was demanding that they be present, not focused on their past failures or future outcomes. The process, or systems-first approach, that allows one to become a proficient archer — much like what it takes to become the version of healthy, lean, and strong that you desire — is realized through consistent and purposeful action. 

Body transformation is similar to archery in that you are looking to hit a certain target. You can try so hard on a particular variable that you end up overshooting your target, manifesting more issues and frustrations. While all targets are achievable, the energy you’re spending aiming the arrow is energy not spent developing your system to consistently deliver the best technique. If you’re too conscious of the technical components of shooting, you wont be relaxed enough to deliver the desired result. As marksman say these days, “slow is smooth, smooth is fast.” Because we are what we repeatedly do, a practice of excellence put into action is the surest way to maximize our trajectory and deliver us to the body, health, and life we want. 

A systems-first approach can improve the trajectory by providing us with a structure to follow. If you are not who you want to be it is because the error of your ways has led you astray from the person you want to become. Generally this due to an accumulation of errors. Over time, small decisions can accumulate into large consequences. Think of it as the 1% rule, whereby repeating a 1% error day after day by replicating poor decisions, tiny mistakes and rationalizing little excuses all compound into toxic results. It is this accumulation of too many missteps that eventually lead to larger problems down the road. 

To make this more relevant, in his book Why We Get Fat, author Gary Taubes states that over consuming roughly 1% on your calorie intake over a 20 year period will equate to a 20lb increase in weight. “Since a pound of fat is roughly equal to 3500 calories, this means you accumulate roughly 7000 calories worth of fat every year. Divide that 7000 by 365 and you get the number of calories of fat you stored each day and never burned — roughly 20 calories.” On average, we consume around 2700 calories a day, so matching energy in to energy out, with the 20 calorie mark equates back or our 1% rule. {reference (https://garytaubes.com/inanity-of-overeating/)}

Making a choice that is 1% better or worse seems insignificant in the moment, but over the span of a lifetime, or the course of a journey toward your goal, small choices determine the difference between who you are and who you could be. Therefore, success is the product of implementing a good system, not a singular focus on a distant goal. 

With a systems-first approach, trajectory can be fully applied and set toward gaining the healthful life we all desire. Let’s use a Global Positioning System (GPS) as an analogy for a systems-fist approach to get what we want. It is a literal manifestation of a system designed to get you where you want to be. By allowing the goal to set the direction, we can trust the system to align the course.

• A GPS gets you to your destination faster and with less stress. Not knowing where we are going and without help we can get lost quickly. Trusting the system can alleviate the stress of trying to navigate on your own.

• A GPS provides constant feedback. By constantly assessing your progress, it will keep you aware of where you need to turn and how far you are from your desired destination. 

• A GPS foresees upcoming obstacles. It has the ability to reroute you around roadblocks and anything else that will deter you from arriving at your destination. 

• A GPS will help you get back on track if you happen to deviate from the path. We all have missteps in our journey, but any wrong turn can be righted by rerouting and correcting course.

Whether you want to lose weight, get stronger, or save money, it pays to incorporate  systems-first approach. Without it, you may find yourself lost, confused, and failing over and over. 

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goals set the direction, systems get you there

goals are impermanent, systems are permanent 

goals work on sacrifice, systems work on fulfillment

goals say I want to look fit, systems allow you to be the fit person

goals are about the results you want, systems are about the processes that lead to the results

goals provide a picture of who you want to be, systems allow you to become that person